Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Foiled Again

Fig.1 Flying Machine
This morning I walked into the unused field across from headquarters (my house).  Since it appeared to be unused, I went ahead and marked it as MINE!  While there, I found the flying machine I require.  I need this machine because my legs are so short.  This will provide the means to better survey all the land around me that I will eventually DOMINATE.

I have tried to get on top of the furniture to conduct my surveys, but 1) most of the furniture is made for people with long legs 2) the people keep taking me off of the furniture (INFIDELS!) and 3) the furniture is inside the house which makes it difficult to conduct surveys beyond the living room.

In any case, while I was trying to get Minion #1 (@tipperthedog) to start the flying device, she went into spastic fit and started rolling on the ground.  Honestly, I don't know how we ever get anything done.  By the time she was done, the people came over and took over the flying machine leaving us there on the ground.  How frustrating!!

The only positive thing that came out of this experience was that I found a piece of paper on the ground with pictures of an uninhabited island.  From the pictures, it looks very warm and not at all cold and snowy like it is here now.  (Curse the weather-controller people for making it snow!)  My plan is to research this and see if it is possible to take over the entire island, but I need to find a pack-mate with more knowledge of geography to assist us.  My people took all of my maps away and Minion #1 is lucky to find her water dish in the mornings much less find the location of a desert island.

So, I am soliciting new pack-members who possess at least a modicum of knowledge about geography and are willing to aid in the quest for WORLD DOMINATION!!  Who is with me?!

No comments:

Post a Comment